Is fear of rejection keeping you from asking for the sale?
You know you’ve got a product or a service that changes lives. And I bet that you understand that holding back from sharing does your dream clients just as much of a disservice as it does you.
But what happens if you pitch them perfectly and they still say NO? Is your business doomed? Should you just pack it all in and run back to the “safety” of a steady J-O-B?
If you’re part of The Pitch Queen Royal Family (as I know you are!), that’s not the option you had in mind. Still, it’s a tempting one if you’re facing a sales drought, a crisis in confidence, or you’re reeling from the conversation you just had with the fifth person who turned you down this week.
Nobody said selling is always easy. But falling victim to the fear of rejection can make selling impossible. If you’re not careful, fear of being told NO can turn into an assumption that you WILL be told NO. (And self-fulfilling prophecies have nothing better to do than fulfill themselves, don’t they?)
Still, even though you know that hearing NO is just part of business, fear of rejection in sales is a real thing. After all these years, I’ve built up some pretty solid resilience, and that nagging doubt doesn’t get me like it used to. But that doesn’t mean that I don’t remember what it was like. I’m not saying that I never have my moments, either. I’ve just learned how to get past them faster and with more efficiency.
How do you feel that fear and ask for the sale anyway? That’s what I’m going to teach you today!
The first step in solving a problem is knowing what the problem IS. So let’s start with some of the most common reasons why people fear being turned down in sales.
#1: You connect your sales success to self-worth. We all want to be successful in business. But sometimes it’s all too easy to connect your self-worth to the size of your bank account or the number of clients on your roster. What happens when you fall into that habit? You end up fearing the blow to your self-esteem almost more than you fear missing out on a sale.
#2: You assume before you start that the answer will be NO. With my last company FITzee Foods, I had a contract with the Vitamin Shoppe. They stocked my products at select locations, and I had six months to prove that featuring those products would be worth their while. The only problem was, I have to admit, I was living that six months in fear.
I knew we had a deadline. And as much as I was committed to being successful, there was more fear that they’d pull the plug on our deal than I cared to admit. And guess what happened? Six months came and went, and in the end, they said, “thanks but no thanks.”
Your mindset has a lot to do with what happens to you in business and in life. If you assume that you’re going to be told NO, then you’ll live in fear of rejection of hearing NO. (And maybe even manifest that rejection without meaning to.)
#3: You are desperate for quick cash. This pretty much explains itself. But if you’re terrified that you won’t make rent unless you make this next sale, those fear-based vibes only beget more fear-based vibes. And that fear of rejection goes through the roof (and tends to put off potential customers).
Those are some of the main reasons why we fear hearing NO. Now that we’ve established the WHY, what do you do to slow down or stop that fear of rejection? Here are some of my go-to tips to prevent that fear from grabbing you by the throat and stopping you cold.
#1: Assume success instead of bracing for failure. When you’re getting ready to put an offer on the table, what runs through your mind? Maybe you’re putting words in your client’s mouth without even realizing it. Perhaps you’re already sure your prospect will say, “It’s too expensive” or “It’s not the right time” before you even start the conversation.
But if that’s what you’re thinking, your results will probably match it. I kid you not, my friends: the way you believe a pitch is going to turn out carries a lot of power. Tweak your beliefs to your advantage as much as possible by envisioning the outcome you want rather than fearing the one that you don’t.
#2: Focus on ACTION instead of analysis. You can’t control the outcomes. All that you have a say in are the actions that you take. Why spend the time analyzing what might go wrong with a sales pitch, and instead take the decisive steps you can to foster the results you want? Focus on the actions you can control, like the number of contacts you make every day, how much content you share, or how many networking events you attend. Put the ball in your court when you can, and let go of the parts that aren’t up to you.
#3: Remember that selling is serving, NOT scheming. People still hate the word “sales.” My mission is to help you as the salesperson or the entrepreneur remember that selling is SERVING. It’s not based on greed, deceit, or demand. And if you’ve got a life-changing product or service, how is selling it anything but helping people achieve their dreams?
Stop thinking about sales like a scam. Remember that you’re providing an honest and noble service. It’ll make the idea of rejection a lot less daunting.
#4: Practice and role play with real people. Got a business bestie? Give him or her a call and get together for a some pitch practice! Hit them with your best pitch, and let them respond as a prospect. Ask them to come up with as many objections as they can, and find as many ways to answer them on the fly as you can. Have your buddy give you constructive feedback and suggestions, too.
The more that you get used to hearing the typical objections, the more easily you’ll be able to answer them with poise. And the less that you’ll fear hearing them in the first place.
#5: Remember that YOU are not your sales success. Don’t let the any of the numbers in your business define you as a person. Remember that YOU are a worthy human being just as you are. Getting a YES or a NO on a pitch has no bearing on that. If you can remember this simple fact, it’s going to do that much more for your overall confidence.
So you know WHY people fear rejection. I’ve shown you HOW to prevent that fear of rejection from keeping you stuck. What happens, though, when the inevitable rejection actually happens?
First, remember not to take it too personally. When someone says NO, it’s pretty much a guarantee that it’s about them and not you. Second, recall that a NO today doesn’t mean NEVER, either. It just means (as I like to put it) “NO”t now. Finally, don’t take rejection too seriously! Remember, business should be more fun than it isn’t. And if you live all the time in fear of being turned down, you won’t be having any fun at all. Take a deep breath, have a laugh, and go on to the next project. You don’t have to be serious from dawn until dusk. Bring a little bit of fun into your day, and get that positive energy going, even when things look grim.
Nobody gets told YES all the time.
That’s just business. But don’t let the fear of rejection take the wind out of your sails before your journey even starts. Remember your worth, be ready to handle objections, and don’t take the outcomes too personally. All of these steps will ensure that you find the courage to ask for the sale, the resilience to stay in the game, and the vision to continue pursuing your dream.
What happens AFTER the NO, though? If a prospect gives you the brush-off, how can you bounce back, stay strong, and learn from it without falling into despair? I share my Top 5 tips for getting back in the game after you strike out in my NEW Checklist, “5 Ways To Come Back From Rejection In Sales: A Checklist For Inspiration and ACTION” right HERE!
