Many of us grow up with dreams and aspirations of being something amazing. Some of us dream of being a doctor, others want to be entrepreneurs. No matter what place you are in your life, the sky’s the limit when it comes to your career!
However, no matter how badly you want something, the decision on success is often out of your control. There are factors that you have no say in, that could ultimately be the reason you received a NO. It’s important not to let that get you down. Use that NO to propel you to do things that you wouldn’t have done otherwise. You will never ever regret it!
In one of my latest Success Unfiltered podcast episodes, I had the pleasure of interviewing Kara Kay, who heard her very first NO at the age of 18. At 18 many of us are just beginning to think of our futures, but Kara knew what she wanted, and never let a single NO hold her back.
Are you ready to “leave it all on the dance floor”?
In order to achieve true greatness, you have to put your full self into all of your work. Hearing YES isn’t the ONLY way to be successful, doing your best, and giving it your all can have the same impact on your life.
Do you flounder when you hear the word NO? Does your resolve begin to crack or start to waver, and you feel like you want to crawl under a rock?
I understand, NO is a scary word that can be taken to mean failure, but around these parts, failure just isn’t an option. So, take a lesson from Kara– Crawling under a rock is the last thing you want to do. Instead, start taking action in your life now! There may not be a tomorrow.
For Kara, that meant focusing on school, traveling abroad, and even studying at the University of Oxford. For you, that could mean sitting down and reading that book that’s been on your nightstand for weeks, or going kayaking, or whatever is in your heart, but just do it!
If you’ve begun taking action in your life, but you still have the sinking feeling of insecurity weighing you down, then it’s time for some positive self-talk. The negative feelings or behaviors aren’t going to help. Thinking or acting like a victim will not fix anything, instead take some time to really hash out what makes YOU happy and then go after it.
Get To Know YOU
Kara is a PRIME example of someone who took the time to get to know herself, know her self-worth and experience life. It had always been Kara’s dream to be a Chargers’ Girl and in order to do that, she had to make a decision to face her fear. So, at the age of 23 she went back, and WOW’d the judges and was fortunate enough to be awarded a position on the squad.
Now, think about what might have happened in Kara’s life if she had decided to let her fear dominate her. She would have never had this opportunity.
Think about it. Is fear stopping you from conquering something?
Is there a big scary goal that you’ve had on your mind for a long time, but have allowed fear to run the show?
If so, now’s the time to take action, stop dwelling on any NO’s you’ve received in the past. Step outside your comfort zone. It will be worth it, I can almost guarantee it!
Support Plays A Role
We’ve talked about this before, but having a strong support network surrounding you is incredibly important when it comes to overcoming obstacles. It’s just another way to get over rejection you may have experienced. But, what happens when your biggest cheerleader tragically leaves your life?
Sadly, there are experiences in life that are just out of our control. In this vein, Kara lost her mother to a battle with breast cancer. It was a devastating loss for her, but she has chosen to wake up and let herself really feel what she’s going through, but to choose happiness because that is what her mother would have wanted for her.
You may not have experienced a death, but there may have been some other devastating circumstances in your life. Look at those as learning lessons, take what you need to away and then focus on happiness.
Lean on the support network you’ve created and overcoming obstacles will be much easier.
Resiliency Brings More Success!
If you are fortunate enough to be working in a career you’re already passionate about, or you own a business you love, then you’ve made it! For those of us who are still going through dozens and dozens of NO’s, don’t let it get you down. Don’t stop the forward momentum.
Kara became a real estate agent and in the beginning experienced so much judgement because of her age, her looks, her assumed inexperience, and she heard NO after NO, but she refused to let that stop her. She was resilient and authentic and with time her clients saw this and were just lining up to work with her.
If you’re still going through those NO’s, instead of dwelling on them, ignore them. Ignore the naysayers, don’t compare yourself to others, and focus in on what you want. Set your sights on your target and then just push through. Be yourself and people will fall in love with you.
Stop Comparing Yourself
No matter where you are on your journey, there will be someone who has accomplished more than you. First thing you need to do, is stop viewing your journey as a competition. You have no idea what any other individual has gone through to get to the point they’re at. It’s possible they’ve been working on their business for 10 years, and just became successful in the last year. They may be overcoming obstacles just like you are, or they’ve experienced 30 NO’s before they finally heard that magical YES.
The point is, the only person you need to compare yourself to is YOU. Set your goals, then compare your achievements to those goals, and ONLY those goals. Ask yourself how you did, and if you could do better next time? Spend your time making those improvements.
The more time you spend watching someone else’s journey, the more time you’re taking away from your own work and advancement. Put your head down, read great and inspiring books, and do what you need to do to get to the next level. It will happen seamlessly!
That’s it! That is the ONLY comparison that matters. Don’t allow yourself to get “lost in the sauce,” as Kara would say.
In Conclusion
If you’ve spent any time dwelling on a NO your received, and you’ve allowed it to permeate your outlook on life, try to reframe what you’re experiencing. Think of all the experience you’ve had and how they have positively impacted your life, and then work like hell to keep your focus on your own lane and your own journey!
