So you’re completely psyched about this new big thing you’re selling. And a little bit nervous, too.
You know that you’ve got the goods to help your clients have massive success. That’s not the problem. It’s that you’ve looked at your numbers… and you got that gut-punch reality check a lot faster than you expected.
You need a sale. It’s crunch time. And the pressure is ON. Close this next client, that next deal, get that $500k from an investor, or else…
Ever had this moment? If you’ve been selling anything for any length of time, I bet you know just what I mean.
That’s where that unfair irony can come in. You need the sale. You need that investor. You need that client. But those fear-based, client repelling vibes are flying all over the place. That’s the moment where you might make the fatal mistake that drives customers away faster than a screaming child in a long line at Baskin-Robbins.
It’s when the sale stops being about your clients & customers. And you make the sale about YOU.
Trust me, I get it. You’ve got to make sales & raise money in your business. If those sales aren’t happening right now, you’re panicking.
But what do you do when you have that gut-grinding “gotta make the sale” moment and yet you know that people aren’t going to respond to a desperate and needy vibe?
Maybe you’re there right now. And I have an invitation for you.
It’s an invitation to take the pressure off of yourself to perform. Stop, relax, and remember the cornerstone of the sales process. It’s a simple 4-word sentence that should become your mantra.
“IT’S NOT ABOUT YOU.”
That isn’t meant as a smackdown. It’s meant to be liberating.
Sure, you have to represent yourself and what you’re selling with passion and integrity. That part is ALL you.
But the sale itself is not about YOU. It’s about the CLIENT, your CUSTOMER, or your INVESTOR. And trust me, this is good news!
All you need to do is love what you’re doing, care about your clients, customers & investors, and want the best possible outcome for them. That’s it!
It comes back to what we talked about last week: Relationships and rapport come first. And no harmonious relationship has ever come from desperation, neediness, or fear.
This is your invitation to give yourself a break. Get out of your worried mind and focus on being of service. Believe me, you’re going to like this a lot better than the panic-stricken alternative.
Because in the end, not only is it not about you, but it’s also not about what you’re selling. You’ve got to know what it is that really makes your clients feel inspired to buy:
Genuine connection. Real relationships. This is what helps close the deal.
That is what inspires, delights, and excites people. That’s what closers know. And now you know it too!
So how do you start opening the door and inviting in a potential client or customer without worrying whether or not you’ll score the sale?
Let’s start with taking yourself out of the picture. Take a moment and ask yourself what that client or customer is really looking for. What is going to make a difference in their lives, their health, their sales, or whatever it is that they’re looking for?
It’s the kind of thing that you only find out by investing the time with that person, listening more than you talk, and seeing things through their eyes.
When you’re speaking to someone, no matter who it is or what the circumstances are, be with that person. Be genuine, open, and sincere. Take an honest interest in what they have to say.
This isn’t the time to “Fake it ‘til you make it.” True rapport and real relationships just don’t work that way. If you can’t be sincere, you might as well stay home and not talk to anyone.
But how do you get that conversation started?
Here’s a little guideline you can use courtesy of my friend and colleague, Emily Page of Pearl Resourcing.
When you’re getting to know someone new, there’s a couple of different types of questions to consider. She calls them “external questions” and “internal questions”.
External questions are direct communication from you. Asking about their next big goal, what would help them the most right now? What they want next in their life?
Internal questions require a little bit of intuition. It’s listening to the other person and hearing what they’re saying. Ask yourself: What could this person be thinking about that they’re not saying yet? What would really make them happy, and how can I help?”
When you focus outward, you have less time to worry about what you’re going to say next. Because you’re listening rather than waiting to talk.
When you ask yourself “What does this person really want?” instead of “Are they going to buy from me or not?” It’s a whole new ballgame.
You focus on their potential outcome, not yours.
Best of all, you’re sincerely letting someone else know you care about them. And THAT is the start of a beautiful relationship.
Getting back to the original point: People buy people. They buy relationships. And relationships start with rapport.
That means remembering the part of the process that isn’t about business at all. The part about connection. That true authentic connection.
What are they going to remember about you? It’s probably not your fabulous product presentation or every little last detail of your brand-new coaching program or your pitch.
It’s how you made them FEEL. The fact that you listened. Asked curious questions. And most of all, that you cared enough to REMEMBER what they said.
Maybe a potential new lead told you that they’re headed to London in a few weeks and you sent them an email featuring the hottest sites in the city. Or you remembered their fascination with acupuncture and you referred them to a trusted practitioner. Those little details matter.
People want to connect with people, especially nowadays with all of the noise in the world, both online and offline. If you come off as interested, engaged, and real, you’re going to be that much farther ahead of the curve.
Now, the best relationships aren’t going to happen overnight. No matter how many online gurus tell you they grew their business from zero to 6 figures in 6 months, good things still take time.
So what do you do when you want to keep the rapport going and the relationship brewing for what could be a mutually beneficial “LTR”? (That’s “Long Term Relationship” in old-school dating lingo, kiddos!)
Here are a few tips to help you get organized, stay focused, and show up consistently in front of the people you want to get to know the most:
1) Make that dream client list. Who do you see as your soulmate clients? Anybody out there who you really believe would be a perfect fit? Grab a pen and start writing.
Use the 80/20 rule and put your highest priority peeps at the top. Save the next most exciting ones to round out the list behind them. Think of it as writing up a “dream team” (Fantasy Football, anyone?) Who’s your first-round pick? Who are you curious about meeting but need to know more?
2) Show Up. Check In. Be There. Make a schedule of follow-ups and stick to it. This will remind you to check in with your people on a consistent basis. Make it once a week for the highest priority people and less often, maybe once a month, as you go down the list.
You can email, text, or Facebook message. But let me tell you, nothing beats a PHONE call. Dare to be different and make that connection even deeper by making it a “Face Time” event.
That alone will make you stand out!
3) Connection comes FIRST. Remember the part that’s not about business. Connect with them as people. Send them things once in awhile that have nothing to do with what you’re selling but that you know would make their day.
Maybe they’re into marathons and you heard about a brand-new training program they might like. Tell a client who’s a yogi all about that new hot yoga place that just opened up in their area.
They’ll be thrilled that you remembered the details about them. They won’t forget that you care about them as a person.
And when they’re ready to buy or invest, they’ll know that it has to be from YOU.
So you may be wondering, ok, that’s great….but how long is this “building a relationship” thing going to take, anyway?
I bet you know what I’m going to say, but here it is: It takes as long as it takes.
Here’s another gem that I picked up from my friend Emily (who got it from her father, a sales superstar….)
They may not like you now, but they will tomorrow!
Just because they say “no” today doesn’t mean it’s forever! Keep showing up. Have patience and let things take their course.
You see, there’s something about the law of familiarity. The number of times you show up in their inbox, in their newsfeed, in their instant messenger, in their text message inbox, or on their caller ID. Consistency carries the day here.
Big things might not happen in the time frame you had in mind, but that doesn’t matter.
When they’re ready to close the deal, they might’ve forgotten where they met you but they’ll feel like they know you. They’ll be feeling a sense of connection that they didn’t even know they had.
So don’t worry if someone puts you down at first or blows you off. Just keep showing up, being kind, and delivering value. Remember not to take any of it personally. (Because after all, like we said before, it’s not about you anyway.)
These are the things people never forget. And they’ll make you unforgettable, too. When the time comes for closing the sale or getting that deal, they’ll remember YOU.
Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow. But soon. And if you do it right, you’ll have a customer for life.
So there you have it! Focus outward and take the pressure off yourself. Be sincere and put the other person first.
And watch what happens. Showing up consistently in front of your dream clients and nurturing those relationships for the long-haul doesn’t have to take all day. The return on your time investment just might blow your mind.
Ready to start building long-term relationships but have no idea how to work it into your already overloaded schedule? Showing up consistently in front of your dream clients and nurturing those relationships for the long-haul doesn’t have to take all day. And the return on your time investment just might blow your mind! Click here to get my new guide, “3 Steps To Court Your Soulmate Clients (And Build Relationships that LAST)”!
